Where are the stars on your calendar?

April 24, 2015 By
Share
Pin It
Email

coming soon ticketThroughout life we become conditioned to want, even arguably need a mark in time to look forward to. It’s not that now isn’t important. Now is crucial as it is the only thing that has the power to create next. But there is still something that draws us in when there is a spot on the horizon that we look forward to reaching.

Perhaps it started with that last school bell (yes I am dating myself but you know what I mean!) before summer break. Or maybe it was a holiday that became a particular favorite and you paced your calendar each year to see that date come into view. For some, family vacations were planned as adventures or traditions that were the pinnacle experience year after year.

Because I was a music student and performer for the majority of my growing up years, I can still clearly remember recitals and looking forward to programs and performances. There was a focus and a planning. But more than that, there was a sense of reaching a kind of joy. I counted the days.

The idea of something to look forward to has even made it into many definitions of happiness. Best-selling author and poet Rita Mae Brown is quoted as saying that “Happiness is pretty simple. You need someone to love, something to do and something to look forward to.”

As we move through our lives, what qualifies as something to look forward to changes as we change. In some cases, that may be a transition to much simpler things. In others, it might be that we are ready for something more significant. What matters is to realize the need to identify and define. We cannot look forward to something we have not claimed for ourselves.

Recently I went through a period of time where I recognized that I was growing restless. While I wasn’t dissatisfied with my life overall there was a sense of becoming somewhat bored with it. I was happy in my work, comfortable with my strategies for the future and growing into healthy and nurturing relationships with friends. But something was definitely still missing. I took to my journal and began exploring this and I realized that while I was gaining knowledge for my work, I was not learning new things in my personal life. I also recognized that my calendar had become my guidepost day to day but there were no stars in the pages ahead.

I have come to the conclusion that if we are not growing personally and counting the days to something, we are missing some of life’s sweetest pleasures. And I started working on those stars.

Those stars are guiding lights that keep us moving through the routine with anticipation. Something as simple as a new class has been a highly effective starting point for me. Each Saturday morning I escape! And I am sitting at a pottery wheel or working at the table with clay and creating something of value simply because it is my creation. Learning a new skill, meeting new people and getting stars on my calendar every week.

What about you? My desire for you is that you have many stars in your calendar that you look forward to. What are you looking forward to this week? This month? This year? Where are the stars on your calendar?

Live well. Get some stars!

 

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , ,

Have You Had Your Break Today?

April 20, 2015 By
Share
Pin It
Email

Take a Break words on Road Sign and Stop SignIn 1971, McDonald’s launched a massive advertising campaign that focused on women. It included the slogan that has stayed with them even to today: You deserve a break today! While it might be the children’s love of fries and toys that keep families coming back, initially it was giving Moms a break away from the kitchen.

Early advertising focused on how clean McDonald’s kitchens were and the high quality of the food.  They wanted Moms to relax and know that their family was in good hands, even if just for one meal. It was about giving “her” a break. You deserve a break today! So get up and get away – to McDonald’s!

The idea of a break is perhaps one of the easiest ways to begin introducing a viable self care plan. It isn’t about over-hauling everything. It’s about integrating a few things in a way that incorporates them into your normal routines and life. We are able to sustain those few critical activities by making them part of our life instead of separate. If there is a sense of removing you (vs. replenishing you) the priorities get more conflicted.

So what actually constitutes a break? Are there rules for this? Yes and no. Let’s look at a couple of examples. A vacation isn’t a break if it doesn’t use a pause button somewhere. If you take your work with you and remain constantly in work mode, it’s not a vacation at all. It is in fact just a change in geography. That’s not to say you can’t mix business with pleasure. But you do need to be able to hit that pause button mentally as well as physically. In other words, wherever you are – be there. Whomever you are with, be with them.

Another example to think about is our attachment to electronic devices today, particularly our phones, e-mail, texts and social media. To take a break means you eliminate the normal distractions and disruptions as well as stepping back from routine. When I began a morning ritual of journaling, reading and prayer several years ago I found that there was a marked difference in how I emerged from that time if my phone was not only turned off but actually out of any line of sight. The break wasn’t complete for me unless the phone was removed.

The most important part for understanding the idea of a break is the recognition that it is about just that – a break. Something stops. Not everything, but something, even if just for a moment. Think about the theatre. In between the acts of the play there are breaks. It’s not about what happens on the break. It’s about what isn’t happening. The stage is empty. You are separated from it until it resumes. The same applies with sports. Each year the Super Bowl half-time has grown in its own importance within the event. But its core purpose is not to entertain us; it is to give the players a break. They leave the field. They leave the battle. Even though they may mentally still be thinking about the game, they have a reprieve from the physical demands of the game.

One of the best ways to make certain you are getting the breaks that you need is identifying where you need them. If you work on a computer for hours on end as I do, it’s important to take physical breaks as well as mental ones. It’s not enough for me to shut down the work and socialize online. I need to do as the McDonald’s slogan asserted: Get up and get away. I need to stretch and move.

Here are some thoughts on how to incorporate breaks that may serve you:

  1. Sometimes we simply need a change of pace. We just need to slow down or perhaps speed up. The break can actually be something that surges the adrenalin. Something changes.
  2. A change of place can be effective but it’s critical that the place is something that engages us differently. Moving from one chair to another chair may not be enough. However moving to a chair outside and taking in fresh air and sunshine makes that more possible.
  3. Sometimes we need a change in the people we’re around. If you are always with the same people at work and in your social life, you may want to consider introducing a “break” and engage new and interesting people.
  4. What do you talk about? Even a change in conversation is a nice break. If you always talk about work, make it a point to create opportunities to talk about something else. That’s a break because it engages your brain differently. It can also be a nice break to let the other person guide the conversation. I love chatting with my grand-girl for just this reason. I love the way your brain works. It fascinates me and fully engages me.
  5. What are you reading? This has proven highly effective for me because I am a voracious reader. I tend to read books primary about personal development and achievement. I found my appetite waning on that front and realized it was because the menu had gotten too closely aligned only to my work. I missed fiction. I started incorporating great story telling back into the mix and now those books are in fact a break for me. I immerse myself in the story and come back to my own refreshed.

These are just five things to consider. There are dozens more. Even thinking about what to do with your breaks can become part of the mix. Make this fun. Make this about you, about stepping into a moment that washes over you and leaves you refreshed.

Live today like you want tomorrow to be.

Live well. Take your break today!

 

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , , ,

What is your Mount Everest?

April 11, 2015 By
Share
Pin It
Email

Belief before actionWhat we believe is the most powerful lens in the world.  It goes beyond any technology man has ever developed.  It filters out, distorts, sharpens, softens and expands.  In order to understand anything about ourselves and empower our future it is paramount that we begin the conversation here.

In the words of Henry David Thoreau, “It doesn’t matter what you look at. It matters what you see.”  Your beliefs create your vision.  They determine what you see.  What do you believe? Unsure? Think about what you see.

Your belief system is your window to the world.  If your mind is closed to something, the window is closed and you are missing everything out there – not just one part of it.  If you allow every thought and influence that you encounter to influence your beliefs, it is like every piece of dust and debris staying on your window.  You have to see “through” everything to get to whatever sliver of truth you can discern.  What is distorting, distracting and even shielding your view?

What we believe we are capable of doing is the single most important influence on what we try to do.  No matter how badly you want something, the probability of you achieving your desire is going to be equally proportionate to your belief in whether you can achieve it.  Desire is not enough.  To achieve the right answer, belief must be part of the equation.

Named by Time magazine as one of the 100 most influential people of the 20th century, Sir Edmund Hillary had this offering on the subject after being one of the first to reach the summit of Mount Everest:  “It was not the mountain we conquered, but ourselves.” Each of us at some point, perhaps even now faces our own Mount Everest. Each of us will need to conquer our own disbelief before we can reach the summit.

Wayne Dyer, a contemporary thought leader shares this: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”  It is also true that if you change the things you look at, it will change the way you look at things. The key is that everything about us generates from our belief system and it defines what we see and how we perceive it.

What is powerful about that statement is that it reveals another truth about beliefs. They are not just a lens.  They are also a magnet.  What we believe draws us to thoughts, ideas and even people.  The inverse is also true.  What we believe attracts thoughts, ideas and people to us.

No discussion on the topic would be complete without considering Henry Ford who had more than a few naysayers in his world. It was his unwavering belief in his idea about how a transport vehicle could be powered that resulted in perhaps one of the greatest innovations of at least my generation. Here’s what he said when everything told him it couldn’t be done: “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” I’m certainly glad he believed he could. And that he did.

Live today like you want tomorrow to be.

Live (Believe) well.

 

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Wondering why you quit? Check your daily practices!

April 1, 2015 By
Share
Pin It
Email

Have you ever wondered why you didn’t stay with something? Have you ever thought you lacked self control or had no discipline? The fact is that we can and do stay with things. We all have self control and we all have discipline. It just might not be where we’re looking for it (or really need it!).

RoutineWhen I began to clearly see that we all have the same capacity within us to achieve whatever we aspire to, my life changed. I took responsibility. I discovered my values and set my priorities; and planned my life to honor them. From that perspective, I created and implemented what I call my personal Power 5 or P5 practices.

One of the thought leaders that I enjoy and learn from every time I experience his work is Robin Sharma.  In his Little Black Book for Stunning Success (If you don’t have it – visit his website and get it! he talks about this subject and shares his own daily practices that fuel his personal power.  Some of his practices were aligned to mine.  The list below combines them:

A writing practice  One approach to this comes from Julia Cameron in her program The Artist’s Way.  Personal development expert Brian Tracy advocates beginning each day by re-writing your top ten goals.  What works for me is to take the time to center my thoughts through expression.  This can be digital writing, hand writing or even recording your voice.  But create a journal that is part of your routine. I’ve done a prayer journal, a gratitude journal and for one period of time I did a health journal.  Choose to write and then write!

A movement practice  This can be stretching, walking, a work-out; whatever meets your own need best.  Sometimes it’s good to alternate but have time devoted to your physical body.  Remember that this is part of a routine that’s going to generate power in your day.

A nourishment practice  Are you someone who skips breakfast?  Stop.  It was the one “habit” hardest for me to break that has made the most difference. A smoothie, a piece of fruit – something that generates fuel.  I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase – “If you want the lamp to keep burning, you must put oil in it.”

A spiritual practice This can be reading, listening to music, meditating or prayer or any combination.   This is a personal space but extremely important.  We were created as a multi-dimensional being and we must care for each of those dimensions.

A learning practice  Each day should have some activity included that is about enhancing your skills or increasing your knowledge. Whenever I do not have an actual activity planned, I spend at least 30 minutes reading or listening to an audio or podcast. This is also a great one to do in conjunction with the physical routine.  The key is that it has priority and it part of your daily plan.

A valuable lesson I’ve learned is that creating meaningful change is less about what we stop doing and more about what we start doing. Begin here. Establish your own version of a Power 5 routine. Commit to staying with it for the next 30 days. Something tells me this time, you will continue. There is power in daily practices.

Live today like you want tomorrow to be. Live well!

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , ,

The Collector vs. The Collection: A distinction to think about

March 22, 2015 By
Share
Pin It
Email

As a professed nester, over the years it has become necessary more than once for me to cull through what has been purchased, gifted, inherited, etc. and make decisions about what to keep, give away or toss. That has proven easier with some things than others. This is particularly true with one of my collections.

Stamp CollectionIf you were to visit my home there is something I’m fairly certain you would notice are prominent: Birds. Not live feathered friends requiring care, but images of birds in all artistic mediums. I’m not sure when this particular almost gravitational pull began but I’ve recognized it as being related to my roots and values. I am captivated by the grace and strength of these creatures.

There is something about the freedom of their flight balanced with the care they put into their nests that appeals to me. And their diversity in sight and song is amazing.

Eventually though, space (and taste) mandated that I move from indiscriminately collecting birds to having an art collection that included many different depictions of birds. It was when I made that choice that I began to see a deeper truth.

When we are just a collector, not only do we tend to buy things simply because they are whatever it is we collect, so does everyone who knows us. Not everything we buy or receive really enhances or expands what is already there. That is when we begin to devalue the collection we have built. We run out of space and we run out of enthusiasm. As with anything, being deliberate and intentional raises the value bar. To go from “collector” to “collection” means we protect what is personal and purposeful.

There is a lesson here beyond just physical collections. Are we being intentional and strategic with the people and places we are experiencing? The books we are reading? Are we allowing ourselves to go outside the boundaries of what we’ve always had and experience something or someone new? Are we looking for the deeper meaning of what is drawing us in vs. just the surface appeal?

When we see our days as a collection of experiences and associations that are creating the tapestry of our lives, I believe we will become more selective and that we will evolve beyond just being collectors of whatever comes our way to having a strategic life collection that is powerful and purposeful. What are you collecting?

Live today like you want tomorrow to be.

Live well. Collect well.

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Personal thoughts & insights, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , ,
« Previous Page
Next Page »