A new world of chain reactions

September 21, 2014 By

Paying it ForwardOne of the ideas that has intrigued me recently is how we as a society have adopted and are participating in activities designed to create a chain reaction. It’s really not a new concept but for a very long time, unless we were talking about a domino game it wasn’t something we intentionally set out to create.

And yet today we do.

Whether it’s paying it forward at a Starbucks window, taking on an ice water bucket challenge in support of ALS awareness or inviting friends and families to create gratitude posts on Facebook as examples, we as a society are actively looking for ways to join with a cause and make our world a better place.

What is creating this force of good? From what I have observed, it stems from three fundamental shifts that have impacted all of us. First is the  increased recognition that regardless of how different we may be, as a human race, we universally share the same hopes and dreams, and yes, even fears. Technology has created more than a global economy. It has also created a global neighborhood.  Instead of being limited to watching life go by from our front porches we are seeing it from the pages and screens of social media platforms and digital communities. This brings us together in ways we might never have imagined and allows us to appeal to each other’s basic humanity in ways we would never have dreamed possible.

The second part of this is that we’re able to readily see and share what happens when we take those steps to join in. That serves to fuel the fire for more. Imagine that if you just paid it forward at the Starbucks window and never found out you were number 498 in an ultimate line of over 700 as happened recently in St. Petersburg, Florida. You would still take satisfaction from having contributed to that one person but now you can know that you didn’t just impact one person, you were part of a movement in a single day that touched over 700 lives. That can be some pretty heady and “hearty” stuff. It also means that the next time you pull up, you might even be number 1 in an ultimate line of over 700 instead of number 498. We like being a part of good things.

The third component of this is that it gives legs to our hope that there is good in our world. The news is filled with so much heartache.  We need to know about that, too because we are a part of that as well. But when we have the chance to catch sight of that flame of hope for the good in all of us, it is rejuvenating. We can pause amidst the clutter and chaos and take in a moment that is really just about doing some good. Those moments can even serve to stop the chain reaction of some of the heartache.

How incredibly powerful it is to know that we can create good with such simple acts not just in the moment, but within the moments to come as our actions and examples create the genesis of so many more. The video in today’s post is a story board of this. As each person witnesses a kindness, they are inspired to create one of their own. And in the end, the world is a better place. All because someone cared enough to drop the first domino.

How about it? Let’s start some chain reactions in our lives and with our lives beginning today.

Live today like you want tomorrow to be.

Live well.

Filed Under: Personal thoughts & insights, Success & Significance, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , ,

Live today like you want tomorrow to be

August 3, 2014 By

CompassThe title of today’s post has become my mantra over the past two years and forms the core of my coaching programs. I had always been goal oriented and personally driven, my eye to the future. That’s not a bad thing. Unfortunately though, it meant that I was always working toward something instead of being able to enjoy where I was in the process. Once I realized that the best tomorrows result from living them today my life became much richer.

I frequently check-in and re-affirm my connection and commitment to my personal manifesto that resulted from this shift in my centering. It is a reflection of my core values and the principles that guide my life.  As I’m continuing to enhance our coaching programs, I’ve been reminded again of the importance of having this level of personal awareness and commitment at the forefront.

  1. I aspire always to honor God in my thoughts, words and deeds.
  2. I have a responsibility to take care of myself and to live well.
  3. I am here to make a difference and enrich the lives of others.
  4. I recognize that what I do today is forming my tomorrow. I do not think about what might have been. I act on what will be.
  5. A curious nature is my most valuable trait. My most powerful tool for myself and others is the right question.
  6. I acknowledge that time is my ultimate resource. I do not try to manage my time. I set priorities and they determine how, where and why my time is invested.
  7. I do not think in terms of failure. I think in terms of effort and experience.
  8. I appreciate that a change of place is often the best way to change my perspective.
  9. Outside of universal laws, the only rules that apply to me are those that I have accepted. By accepting (or not accepting) any guidelines, I am also accepting responsibility for my choices.
  10. I understand that fear is not a bad thing. Fear is a healthy thing. It is the ultimate expression of respect for what I am undertaking.

No matter where we are in the journey, we must live today like we want tomorrow to be. It is in fact the only way to achieve it.

Live well. Live today.

 

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Personal thoughts & insights, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , ,

The who, what, when, where, how & why of FAITH

April 20, 2014 By

Faith_Faithful_EasterMy personal focus word for this year is faithful. When I chose the word, it was within the context of being faithful to my promise and to my promises. That is key in my life right now because it is a very real struggle, one that by choosing the word I fully acknowledged. I want to be faithful. I yearn to be faithful. And I have found that it is not easy. Because there are many influences inside of me and in my environment that quite often encourage the opposite of faithful. And some of them are there for a good purpose.

Blind faith is not necessarily a good thing. I am learning that there is a middle ground between absolute faith in something and impervious skepticism. It is the place of the student. One of my brothers puts it this way: Trust, but verify. So what happens when you can’t verify? When faith and trust are in fact the ultimate intuitive judgment call? That is the ageless question that faces many of us particularly when it comes to faith within a spiritual context.

What do you accept as proof? How do you believe purely on the basis of faith at a deep enough level for it to challenge and change you? For me, it comes down to this: We must make a decision, a choice based on what we do know.  In too many cases, we drift into our spiritual belief system based on the experiences of our childhood. We either reject what we experienced because we saw hypocrisy or experienced some perceived personal harm or we embrace it as a part of a legacy we’re intended to continue. Neither of those are, in fact, a valid choosing, they are default responses. We must each make a definitive choice or it is not our belief.

For me, it became a matter of three questions:

  1. Do I know what I believe?
  2. Do I know what I don’t believe?
  3. How do I demonstrate my belief?

The core word in all three questions? I

I often refer to my early mentor, Jim Rohn and on this subject he was a critical catalyst.  Here are his thoughts paraphrased:  Whatever you believe, be certain that is the product of your own conclusion. It is at the core of your personal philosophy and will impact everything you do in life. Start there. Be clear that your belief system and philosophy is the product of your own conclusion.

Are there hard facts to back up my belief? Perhaps or perhaps not. But there was sufficient evidence for me throughout history and in my own life to persuade and answer my questions.

Am I clear about what I believe? Yes. There isn’t anything ambiguous about my belief.

Am I clear about what I do not believe? In general. But it is here that there is always room for study and questions. From that will come more answers. In only choosing to be absolute in what I believe, I have created a better place for continued growth and understanding.

How do I demonstrate my belief? Here is where it all comes together because in truth, I demonstrate it in everything. If it is a true belief it influences everything. I believe in God as my creator. I believe I am made in His image and that I too have the ability and need to create. I believe in God as my companion. I believe I was made for the purpose of having a relationship with God.  That means an active and ongoing conversation with Him where we both listen and speak. I believe in God as my father. This carries the willingness to follow His guidance and teachings. That means I must study those and continue to grow in my understanding of what He expects of me and from me. I believe in God as my savior. This allows me to experience forgiveness and freedom at a fundamental level. It also means that I accept responsibility for the decisions I make and accept their outcome with respect but without fear.

That is my belief. My belief also includes that I was not created to dictate your belief. Only my own. This is the ultimate expression of personal responsibility. To celebrate my own belief I must acknowledge your freedom to choose your own without judgment. Because in the end, my belief was born from ultimate and unconditional love.

  • We create in love.
  • We communicate in love.
  • We grow in love.
  • We live in love.

That is the essence of what I believe and is my faith. It is then the essence and basis of faithful. As I was writing about this today I was reminded that it is only by practicing my faith that I am able to be faithful. A life that is created, shares, grows and is ultimately expressed in love including for ourselves, can only produce a life that has that as its outcome. It is only when we deviate from that guidance system that we falter.

A quote I saw recently was this:  “Strive to be remembered for what you would die for.” Powerful. That is what this Easter is about for me. A reminder that we must always do that knowing by faith that ultimately, when we are remembered for what we would die for, it is because that is what we lived for.  A compelling view of purpose.

Live well.

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Personal thoughts & insights, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , ,

How to turn “Once upon a time” into “Here and now”

March 2, 2014 By

When a story begins with the words “once upon a time…”, we expect to hear a fairy tale.  One of those stories where everything is extraordinary and the ending has everyone living “happily ever after”. But those stories also taught us a few character lessons when we first heard them as children.  They taught us courage, perseverance and doing the right thing.  We also learned that happy endings often come at a price, that there is sacrifice as well.

Over the course of time, we stopped remembering the middle of the story.  All we remembered was “once upon a time” and “happily ever after” and so we stopped believing in the fairy tale.

But what if once upon a time could be here and now?  What if happily ever after was not just for children’s stories?  What if we could lay claim to that?  I believe we can.  But we have to put the middle of the story back in.  We have to develop our story, we have to make the sacrifices, we have to slay our dragons.  In other words, we have to do the work.

For many years, any time I was asked to name my top five goals in life one thing on my list was always to write a book.  It was my “once upon a time” story.  And it was definitely staying in fairy tale land for me.  Why?  Because I wasn’t doing the work.  I had the desire but not the commitment.  I wasn’t willing to make the sacrifices I needed to make.  And then I was.

I started to do the work.  I signed up for some writer’s workshops, I participated in writer’s retreats and I started looking for mentors that would be able to guide me down the path of my dream to write that book.  I can’t really tell you exactly when it shifted for me but the shift did happen.  I went from talking about a book to actually working on my book.  I am writing everyday and working with an extraordinary editor and publisher.  It will finish in 2014!

But what really changed?  It wasn’t the desire.  It wasn’t even the skill although that is definitely being aggressively (and enthusiastically!) honed.  What changed is that I started to work.  I picked up that sword from the fairy tale and started slaying the dragons blocking my path.  And I made the sacrifices. My schedule had to make room for this.  That meant something had to go. The investments had to be made in time and money to make the “happily ever after” my “here and now”.

What is it that you want for your life that has been in that secret place or not so secret place of your mind that is your fairy tale?  What first step can you take to begin your work?  Here are four points to ask yourself to help get you from “once upon a time” to here and now”:

1)  You must believe it is possible

2)  You must believe it is possible for YOU

3)  You must be willing to do the WORK

4)  You must be willing to make the necessary SACRIFICES

I remember clearly one of the early lessons I learned from mentor Jim Rohn:  “When the promise is clear, the price becomes easy.”  What we have to remember is that the price remains.

To wrap this up, I’m going to borrow a quote from Sherri Shepard I will never forget as she was departing from the Dancing With The Stars competition about to start up a new season:

“And, I wanna say, to every person out there — that thing that scares you the most, that makes you say, ‘I don’t know if I can do it, I’m scared,’ run towards it because it’s so amazing on the other side.”

I agree.  There is nothing like being on the other side of once upon a time… here and now is unbelievably wonderful!

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Personal thoughts & insights, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Bringing the virtual world home…

February 18, 2014 By

Virtual officeOur lives are enriched everyday by people we have never met in person.  Whether through on-line classrooms, forums, social media or just by reading the stories of incredible people leading extraordinary lives, the influence of the stranger has never been greater.

When we have the opportunity to bridge that virtual space and bring that virtual world into our physical realm, there can be both excitement and a bit of trepidation.

What if we are disappointed?  What if THEY are disappointed?  This of course is the fodder of many discussions when relating it to on-line dating and other personal circumstances but what about when it’s your business?

We engage with people we’ve never met now as a matter of course.  In some cases, they know more about our lives and businesses than our families and friends.  But there is a growing shift to close those gaps.   Even if 90% of the relationship and it’s exchanges stay virtual, there is a definite emphasis coming back to getting eye to eye through video conferencing and face to face at conferences, expos, mastermind meetings and other networking events.

What a wonderful time we live in and how fortunate we are to have all of these marvelous tools at our fingertips!  But as with anything, the strategy we employ and the integrity we maintain will be the key factors in making certain that all of these wonders of technology are being used to an effective end and purpose.

Technology in and of itself is just the tool.  The craftsmen are still required for it to actually create the miracle and transform.

So as we go about our lives, virtually and where there is dust and dirt, let’s not lose sight of the fact that we are still all people with very real lives and dreams.  Virtual doesn’t change who we are.  It just changes how we meet, how we communicate and the opportunity to bring value to so many in so many ways.

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Personal thoughts & insights, Winds of Change Tagged With: , ,

How to finally get (and stay) free of life’s “dust collectors”

January 17, 2014 By

Time For Organize, Business Concept.One year ago I began what initially felt like a herculean task to bring order to my home and office.  I was determined that every room, every closet, every shelf, every cabinet, every drawer would be cleared-out of anything and everything that did not need to be there. I was determined to free myself from clutter. All kinds.

In addition to the undertaking to create order, I also set a goal for myself to give away or donate at least one box or bag of items every week for the first six months.  It was my desire to create an incentive to be less attached to things and to create more breathing space in my environment.

Clean-up and clear-out. And it worked. At first.

Somewhere along the way it stopped working. Why? It stopped because I did.  I considered it temporary work.  It was a project with a definite beginning and a definite end.  That meant it was really just temporary behavior. I never created a commitment to a routine, only to a project.

I can’t argue that I did make great progress.  There is no question that where I am now vs. a year ago is improved. I can argue that I didn’t really change.  Because where I am vs. six months ago is not improved. That is the issue. And six months from now, I will be right back where I was a year ago unless I do change.

This is an example of why we need to look at our daily behaviors when we really want to effect permanent change.  This year I am taking a different approach.  This time my focus is on my daily schedule and putting an organization activity on my agenda every day. That allows me to activate several over the course of a week and a more significant number each month. It also keeps me cycled (and recycled) every month so that the actual work is less. The piles are less daunting, the lists are shorter.  I am not starting a project. I am creating better habits.

Imagine spending just 15 minutes a day over the next 30 days focused on clearing something out.  Then create a list of everywhere that you know requires continuous monitoring and start there. A few ideas to consider (from my list..) might be your e-mail in-box and other folders; your postal service mail baskets and personal papers/bills; your business filing and paperwork; your pantry; your refrigerator; cleaning supplies, and, yes, that infamous junk drawer that we all have.  These are not “once and done” places.  And there are other things to consider.  These are the “dust collectors” that we have to stay on top of to keep a healthy and productive environment.

Change happens with ease when our mindset is open, our motivation is compelling and the method we’ve chosen is effective for us.  I had the right mindset and a compelling motivation.  But I chose a method that worked for other people but not for me.  That’s okay because sometimes (most times in fact) it takes a few tries to find the absolute best method.  Even when we find it, we also know it’s going to change over time because we are growing and changing as a person and our daily practices need to keep pace.

This weekend begins my new approach.  It feels very different.  Not herculean at all. In fact, it feels just right!  Daily practices are the key.  I am continually reminded that to have the “me” I want tomorrow I must live that “me” today.  To have the business I want tomorrow, I must practice that business today.  To have the order I want tomorrow, I must create that order today.  Every day.

Live today like you want tomorrow to be.

What one change in your living or working environment would you like to have in your future? How can you begin today to create it?  Are you ready? Let’s get started!

Filed Under: Personal thoughts & insights, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , ,
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