What seeds will you plant today?

March 10, 2014 By

Planting SeedsIn his teachings,  Earl Nightingale talks about each of us being like farmers and compares our lives to their plot of land.  It is up to us to cultivate that land, to plant the seeds, to weather the storms and to bring in our harvest.

Whatever happens above, under and around our plot of land happens to everyone.  If there’s rain – it rains on everyone’s land.  If there is a draught – everyone has to deal with it. How the farmer prepares the land determines how those universal events effect it in many cases. Land can be cultivated so that it has the right elevation for drainage.  It can also be irrigated with alternate hydration sources.  Those are decisions (and investments) the farmer makes in the land in order to give it the best possible chance to produce the crops desired.

The farmer also must decide what kind of crops he (or she) wants to harvest.  After all, what comes up from the ground is going to be determined by what they put in the ground.  We can’t be surprised if we get get wheat instead of corn if we didn’t plant corn seed.  We shouldn’t expect an oak tree if a pecan seed is what we planted.  But that is quite often what we do with the plot of land called our life.  We want a certain outcome (crop) from our life but we don’t plant those seeds.  Then we are disappointed when we get a result we didn’t want.

If we want sustaining health, we must plant seeds of health.  If we want abundance financially, we must plant seeds of financial health. If we want a masterpiece life, we must plant seeds of mastery. Whatever you want from this experience we call life, you have to plant those seeds and allow them to grow.  A good friend from my college days experienced her final days here on earth this past week. As I read all of the posts from those that have known and loved her over the years since our time together it was clear that the seeds she planted were of excellence, warmth, love and faith. What a special reminder to those with days yet ahead to take care with  “seeds” and both select and plant them well.

It remains fascinating to me that within the seed, there lies the potential of a forest.  Just as the potential of our lives, begins with our days. What seeds have you planted? Are they going to bring the life forest you desire?

Filed Under: Possibilities & Perspective, Success & Significance, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , ,

A new approach: Thinking “inside” the box..

March 5, 2014 By

Inside Your BoxAs a life strategist, one of the places I see people struggle is recognizing who they are and the gifts that are already theirs to claim.  There is great pressure to look outward and to “think outside the box” in pursuit of a “better you”.  So much so that we forget to examine “inside the box” first and see what we may already have within our grasp that can be used to propel us into our true purpose.

One of my favorite exercises we go through is an inventory of knowledge and skills.  The challenge is to take your age and come up with at least that many items of knowledge or skill that you have demonstrated in the course of your life.

The first half is typically very easy for us to record.  The next group might take some thought but we can typically come up with it.  It’s that last group of 15 – 25% that seems to stump us.  But in almost every case, the real gems come from that group.

Since this pattern proved out time and time again, it intrigued me.  I began to look deeper at why this might be true.  It seems that what we have most enjoyed in life about ourselves we tend to think of as “less important” because it may not be associated with our professional life and endeavors.  We operate from the misconception that what we most enjoy is a “sideline” or “hobby” or even something we do “just for fun”.  In truth, quite often it could become more central in our life, even be the secret ingredient for creating our most purpose-driven work.

When we start from where we are with the idea that we already have abundance within ourselves, exploring “inside the box” takes on new meaning.

What about you? If you are dissatisfied with your life, perhaps it’s because you’re focusing on what you don’t have – what is “outside your box”.

Try a new approach.  Take inventory “inside your box”.  Re-focus on what you have and what it can mean to you for building a richer, more satisfying life.

Of one thing I am certain.  You are going to find a gift.

Filed Under: Inspiration & Creativity, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , ,

How to turn “Once upon a time” into “Here and now”

March 2, 2014 By

When a story begins with the words “once upon a time…”, we expect to hear a fairy tale.  One of those stories where everything is extraordinary and the ending has everyone living “happily ever after”. But those stories also taught us a few character lessons when we first heard them as children.  They taught us courage, perseverance and doing the right thing.  We also learned that happy endings often come at a price, that there is sacrifice as well.

Over the course of time, we stopped remembering the middle of the story.  All we remembered was “once upon a time” and “happily ever after” and so we stopped believing in the fairy tale.

But what if once upon a time could be here and now?  What if happily ever after was not just for children’s stories?  What if we could lay claim to that?  I believe we can.  But we have to put the middle of the story back in.  We have to develop our story, we have to make the sacrifices, we have to slay our dragons.  In other words, we have to do the work.

For many years, any time I was asked to name my top five goals in life one thing on my list was always to write a book.  It was my “once upon a time” story.  And it was definitely staying in fairy tale land for me.  Why?  Because I wasn’t doing the work.  I had the desire but not the commitment.  I wasn’t willing to make the sacrifices I needed to make.  And then I was.

I started to do the work.  I signed up for some writer’s workshops, I participated in writer’s retreats and I started looking for mentors that would be able to guide me down the path of my dream to write that book.  I can’t really tell you exactly when it shifted for me but the shift did happen.  I went from talking about a book to actually working on my book.  I am writing everyday and working with an extraordinary editor and publisher.  It will finish in 2014!

But what really changed?  It wasn’t the desire.  It wasn’t even the skill although that is definitely being aggressively (and enthusiastically!) honed.  What changed is that I started to work.  I picked up that sword from the fairy tale and started slaying the dragons blocking my path.  And I made the sacrifices. My schedule had to make room for this.  That meant something had to go. The investments had to be made in time and money to make the “happily ever after” my “here and now”.

What is it that you want for your life that has been in that secret place or not so secret place of your mind that is your fairy tale?  What first step can you take to begin your work?  Here are four points to ask yourself to help get you from “once upon a time” to here and now”:

1)  You must believe it is possible

2)  You must believe it is possible for YOU

3)  You must be willing to do the WORK

4)  You must be willing to make the necessary SACRIFICES

I remember clearly one of the early lessons I learned from mentor Jim Rohn:  “When the promise is clear, the price becomes easy.”  What we have to remember is that the price remains.

To wrap this up, I’m going to borrow a quote from Sherri Shepard I will never forget as she was departing from the Dancing With The Stars competition about to start up a new season:

“And, I wanna say, to every person out there — that thing that scares you the most, that makes you say, ‘I don’t know if I can do it, I’m scared,’ run towards it because it’s so amazing on the other side.”

I agree.  There is nothing like being on the other side of once upon a time… here and now is unbelievably wonderful!

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Personal thoughts & insights, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Subject to change: More than you expected?

February 3, 2014 By

Future_ChangeThe subject of change is something I have been studying now for some time.  It is interesting to me how differently we each view change overall.  It’s also interesting that we don’t recognize all change in the same ways.  Some things that are obvious changes, we don’t even put in that category.

Here are five things that cannot be described as anything other than change and yet we don’t necessarily “categorize” them as change:

1)  Our calendar system.   Today is not tomorrow and tomorrow is not yesterday.  Each day is unique.  Every day we get a new one.  That is change.

2)  Our appearance.  We do not expect to look the same at 2 years old as we do at 20.  We also don’t expect to look the same at 50 as we did at 30 no matter how badly we might want it!

3)  The seasons.  Everything changes.  And depending upon where you live, they will change differently.  Having lived in different parts of the United States, I have experienced different seasons but one thing is for certain- there were always seasons.  They came around every year. And lately, even what happens within the season changes.

4)  Money.  This one is really a great discussion point.  We don’t expect to earn the same amount at 40 as we did at 20.  We don’t expect to pay the same thing for a car in 2013 as we did ten years ago.  We don’t even expect to pay the same price for a gallon of fuel from one week to the next.  We also don’t expect to pay the same amount for something at every store, every day.

5)  Time.  Constantly moving.  Forward.  We can’t turn back time.  And we can’t make it stand still.  It’s going to constantly be ticking away and changing.

If these things are obviously about change, why don’t we think of them as change?  I believe that it because of our perspective.  When we “expect” something to change, we are prepared for it.  We plan for it.  We even begin to look forward to it in many cases.

We look forward to future events!  We look forward to Fridays! We embrace changes in our appearance by evolving with them.  Whether it is changing our hairstyle, our wardrobe, or anything else.  It is part of what is uniquely “us”. The seasons each bring their own unique activities.  We plan our lives around those opportunities.  It starts becoming clear that anticipating change is part of what enables us to enjoy change.

How then can we transfer that perspective to our overall lives?  We can start with understanding that everything in our life is always subject to change.  And everything is always in a cycle.  Wherever we are, we are not meant to stay there.  And whomever we are, we are not meant to remain that person.  We are meant to grow.  That is change. Once we begin to anticipate change and plan for it, we will be at the place where we welcome it like the old friend it should be.

 

 

 

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , ,

Feeling Stuck? 9 Questions That Can Help

January 31, 2014 By

Ideas DirectionThere are times we want to move forward on an important goal but for some reason we just can’t seem to get started.  We want to take the first step but something is holding us back.  When we find ourselves in that situation, it can be useful to have a checklist of questions designed to help find the one log that is jamming our stream of action.

Here are some questions that have proven very effective.  Use them to self-coach your way out of “stuck” and onward to success!

The first step is to identify the place in your life where you are feeling stuck.  Remember, as with any coaching tool, the more specific you are the more powerful the exercise will be. Then get started!

  1. Are you crystal clear about what you want?
    • Sometimes we don’t know the first step because we don’t have a clear direction.
  2. What have you done so far?
    • There’s an assumption that if you’re “stuck” that you started.  If you haven’t started, go back to the first question!
  3. If you started and stopped, why did you stop?
    • This is a key step.  Did other priorities take over? Did you get overwhelmed? Examine why you stopped because if you know that and can deal with that, you will re-start with greater ease and be better prepared to prevent getting stuck again.
  4. What is one thing you know you can do today to move forward?
    • There is always something.  It can and should be a small step.  Those are the most effective.  And you will know what it is.
  5. Who has already done what you want to do?
    • Having an example to follow can save you time and give you a clear starting point. Just make certain they have actually done what you want to do.
  6. How did they do it?
    • Do your research! If you can, interview them.  Find out what they did FIRST!
  7. What resources (skills, contacts, tools) do you have that can help move you forward?
    • Have you taken inventory of everything at your disposal? Have you taken advantage of it?
  8. What options haven’t you considered?  Why not?  Even the impossible ones!
    • There are always one or two options that we immediately dismiss out of hand.  Go back and look at those options.  Make sure that if you believe they won’t work you ask yourself why.  What if it could work? What would my next step be. Quite often we find they will work.
  9. What decision have you been avoiding?
    • It’s last on the list because if you’ve gotten this far, somewhere there was a decision to be made that you avoided.  What is that decision? Why are you avoiding it? What can you do to give yourself permission to make it?

Somewhere in these nine questions you are going to find the one thing that is the ideal “unstuck” remedy for you.  And once you tackle that one – the rest are going to fall away and you will once again be on your way!

Each of us gets “stuck” for different reasons in different situations.  There have been times that I know I didn’t move forward because I was not willing to let go of something in order to move forward.  That might be a discovery at #3, #8 or even #9. But eventually I got to the root cause and you can, too.

#8 can bring about very new possibilities.  Ideas are sometimes not considered because they failed in the past or just seemed like too great a risk.  But times change and so do we.  Just because something failed in the past does not mean it will fail now. One of my clients had applied for a business loan years before and was turned down and was not even considering a small business loan for a new venture idea.  When we talked about what had changed since the original loan was declined and even talked about why the original loan was declined it was clear that the situations were very different.  She applied and was funded!  It’s an important step.

My personal favorite in discovery sessions is often #7.  We have these hidden gems in our life.  Talents, knowledge, people – so many resources! So often we don’t look at our own arsenal of options.  We focus on what is missing instead of what is ALREADY THERE!

So here’s my challenge to you:  Take stock of where you are in every area of your life.  Where are you not moving forward?  Focus there and go through these questions.  Amaze yourself!  Because you were born to be amazing! And if you’re ready for a possibility partner, let me know! We are here to help.

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , ,

6 Ways to Leverage the Past Without Living There

January 30, 2014 By

iStock_000005283419XSmallJanuary is almost behind us.  Has it flown by for you?  That has been the case for me this year. It seems as though it was just a blink ago that I was sharing the holidays with my daughter and her family in Oklahoma.  And some days it seems like just a blink ago that I was sharing the holidays with her as a young girl here at home. On days like today where the rush of time passing gives me pause, I am reminded of the value in looking back even as we live in the present.

This is one of those subjects where then can be some pesky “fine lines”.  There are endless debates and writing on looking forward vs. looking back almost making them seem mutually exclusive of each other.

Like me, you have no doubt seen the many social media posts that talk about the “good old days” with a bit of a nostalgic, even bittersweet angst.  Those images can appeal to the sentimental yearnings of our nature.  However, they can also distort our perspective and set us up to somehow pit the “old days” against the “new days” in some sort of bizarre competitive dance.

One that I found amusing recently had a picture of an old hand crank operating wringer washing machine.  Since that was something I actually used one summer I spent with a Great Aunt and Uncle, I could say I definitely remember that one! But I certainly don’t want to trade the multi-everything version I have today that allows me to multi-task laundry with just about anything else I do.  Anymore than I want my old typewriter back. I enjoy the luxuries of modern tools!

On the flip side, we also see many messages directing us to turn from the past.  After all, we don’t live there anymore.  We are encouraged to stop looking back at all and to only look forward.

So which is right?  When we face these kinds of questions, it is where we can miss the opportunity to gain the best we can from every part of our life.  We want to make things “either or”.  But the truth is that there are very few times when we have to choose, or at the very least, we don’t have to choose exclusively.  It is about perspective.

There is a difference between looking to the past and living in the past.  Let that sink in a moment.  We can look to the past without living there.  That means the richness of the past can continue to serve even as we move to the future and all of the new opportunities afforded to us.

Here are six ways looking back can clearly serve us.  Using this as a checklist, we can keep things in the right perspective.

The first three focus on others from the past.  These can be those from our personal circle or legacies from a broader stage.

-To honor those that made a difference in the world and our lives

-To learn from the experiences of those that traveled this path before us

-To be inspired by the example of others that faced relatable challenges

Here in the USA, we all pause on September 11th and remember those that showed the world the face of courage.  Each year we honor our veterans.  Several of our holidays focus on specific figures from a shared history.  Think for a moment about the popularity of quotes from historical figures.  We pay attention to the wisdom expressed because we acknowledge the legacy of the speaker.

The next three focus on our personal experience.

-To see how far we have come.

Sometimes the road ahead can shrink just by looking at the road behind.  This can be a highly motivating use of looking back.  Even if we haven’t come as far as we’d like, that can be motivating as well.  It’s a check-point practice.

-To leverage knowledge from a previous experience.

We want to repeat solutions that worked.  And avoid those that did not.  When we are faced with a challenge, it is productive to think back to another time when we were faced with something similar and came through.  What did we do?  What can we use in this situation?  This can also boost our self-confidence and allow us to handle challenges with more agility because we’ve mentally already overcome them simply by remembering past victories or knowing what pitfalls to avoid.

-To give ourselves the opportunity to change our perspective.

Sometimes in life, particularly where there has been some pain, it can greatly distort our perspective about a person, an exchange or an event.  Distance can be a great leveling period that allows us to diffuse the more acute emotional responses and see things with a clearer mind.  That allows us to change our own perspective and hopefully, be open to learn, to forgive (ourselves or others) and to build on a stronger layer of understanding and empathy for others.

Three based on others.  Three based on ourselves.

Begin today.  Look to the past.  Embrace it.  Leverage it.  But don’t live there.  Use it to make a better tomorrow:  For yourself, your family, your community and ultimately, our world.

Filed Under: Learning & Growth, Possibilities & Perspective, Winds of Change Tagged With: , , ,
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