Have you read the book?

The news and social media threads have been filled lately with excitement about a particular movie. A movie many have been anticipating for a very long time.

No one wanted any spoilers for this one. In fact, several people even posted that if you were the one that did “spoil” it for them, you would be immediately and unceremoniously unfriended.

We love our heroes, even our villains and their stories.

Movies bring them to life sometimes in ways we might not quite have the imagination to conjure.

But my first question is usually about the book.

Many (most) movies have their origins in a book.  Sometimes the story translates well into the film media and sometimes it does not.  When it does not it is usually because of one of two factors:

  • The story line is changed in some material way by the omission of a character or scenes in order to address constraints of the film format for length/budget that results in gaps in the story; or,
  • Something within the story is materially changed due to cast selection, location, or other visual factors that when left to the imagination of the reader, were more relatable.

One thing that I have learned as a writer is that when artists create something it is fully integrated with their point of view whether the work is written, recorded, or other mediums.  It can be a challenge to allow someone else to fill in our blanks, whether that person is our reader or someone repurposing the work in another medium. Rather like someone telling us about the movie and how it ends before we’ve had a chance to see it for ourselves.

Consider visual art.  Each viewer can interpret it differently.  It’s not likely that they will interpret the work according to the artist’s intent.  That is really at the heart of this area of discussion – what needs to be honored most?  Is it the artist’s original intention or the freedom of interpretation of the consumer? More importantly, which should we encourage?

In my mind, the answer is straight forward.  The interpretation of the consumer will always trump the artist’s intent.  A reader’s response is no more predictable than someone sitting in a theatre watching the story unfold.  We each bring our own perspective and lens into the mix. That’s part of the beauty of the human experience.

When we are the creator, we must do what it is we do best and learn to develop and trust the right circle of collaboration, including our audience.

It is what works best with anything.  We are responsible to do our finest work.  The ultimate objective after all is to meet the audience where they are and then transport them to where they want to go.  Once we realize that they (our audience) are in fact our silent co-creator it becomes easier to make the space for them to be effective in their role. We may provide the conveyance, but ultimately they choose their own destination.

More than any other lesson in life, this one has been most challenging for me. I want to focus on the result, on the response. That’s not where we do our best work. Our best work is born from the creative process and focusing there. Allowing ourselves (and our audience) the surprises that will unfold. That is what I am looking forward to in the coming year above all else. The surprises in store. The transformations we will create together.

Live (create) today like you want tomorrow to be. Live (create) well.

 

 

Where did I put that?

Woman Searching For Something In DrawersYou know the moment I’m talking about. You had it and you put it somewhere. Now if you could just remember where, you could get it back. You really need to find it. But it seems the harder you try, the more elusive it gets. Perhaps it’s your car keys, your glasses, a book, a bill, a favorite shirt. You had it and now you cannot find it. It can be frustrating, even a little maddening.

But perhaps it’s something more. Perhaps it’s your money, your time, your health, your friends, other things of value that seem to be slipping from your grasp and you’re struggling to better manage and keep up with them. You know it was there, but where did it go? Where did you lose it?

It happens to all of us. One of the reasons it is showing up more and more could be that we think it’s a matter of just finding it again, a once and done sort of thing. But that is not the case. Keeping track of what matters is not a one-time thing or even a sometimes thing, it’s an all-the-time thing.

Since this continues to pop up in my own life and I hear it increasingly from clients and friends, I am more convinced than ever that at the core of this is the fact that we are still not fully engaged every day with our values and priorities. We say that we are and yet, we are not living them. It can be a struggle or it can be a strategy. The choice is ours.

This is the true meaning of “Live today like you want tomorrow to be”. It all comes back to us and how we are living our values and the priority we are giving them in our day to day lives. It requires us to be honest with ourselves about what we want, where we are and what we are willing to do to close that gap.

Here are a few places we can check in with ourselves:

  1. Bank accounts – Do they reflect your values and priorities for financial responsibility and freedom? Are you being strategic with financial resources? When you want something are you looking at the true cost or just the payment? Do you spend like a consumer or an owner?
  2. Personal calendars – Ah, time. The great equalizer! Do you keep a calendar? That’s the first question. If not, perhaps that’s where you should start. Create a written record of what is happening and then begin to see how it changes because now it is about where you are choosing to be vs. where you are showing up.
  3. The pantry – This is currently one of significant importance for me because health is not only a key value, it’s a new priority. So my refrigerator and pantry had to become my friend, my partner and not my enemy! They could not pulse with temptation; they had to provide healthy options. Once again though, it’s a continuous commitment. The cupboards being bare can be almost as detrimental as having poor choices.
  4. Personal libraries – Did you know that one of the key resources identified by highly successful people as pivotal to their success is their personal library? Today this isn’t just about physical books; it’s about all kinds of media and resources. What do you have at your disposal and what are you leveraging for personal development? Many people tell me that they are life-long learners and yet when pressed for information about what they are learning now, it is undefined and certainly not strategic. How easy it is to change that! Whether it is a book, a class or even a subscription to a magazine, blog or podcast, having this in our daily routines is powerful and life changing.
  5. Our friends and families – A core practice within business, particularly for leaders is something we call a 360 degree or peer review. Getting feedback from those closest to us is invaluable in helping us gain a new perspective about our role and contribution. We often fear these because we think it’s about critique. But that is not always the case. In fact, from my experience, it can be just the opposite. Here is a good way to start: Choose the five people most important to you from your inner circle. A combination of friends and family is helpful but it really depends on you. Ask them to rate your relationship (not you – your relationship) on a scale of 1 to 10 for a level of satisfaction. If it’s anything other than a 10 –ask them what you would both need to do to make it a 10. It’s a conversation that has completely changed many relationships (and lives!). .

If this all sounds over-whelming (or like too much work!) then pick one and focus there for the next 30 days. Layering change is often the best way for creating lasting change. But get started. Find out where you put those all important things and reclaim them! Know where they (you!) are everyday.

Live today like you want tomorrow to be. Live well.

Staying the course – Finishing the race!

Finish the race

Successful people seem to have an uncanny ability to adapt and adjust in the right places at the right time in order to make it to the finish line every time. Join their ranks and be confident in your personal perseverance power by adopting these five principals as your own.

#1:   Keep your eye on the finish line

What is waiting for you at the end? What is that promise?  When we stay focused on the end goal, it gives it a magnetic quality that will help pull us through tough times and circumstances.

#2:   Fuel your fire

Mother Teresa taught: To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it.”

How are you keeping your commitment vital and alive? What are you feeding to your internal energy furnace?

#3:   Focus on consistent steps – not leaps & bounds

What we do daily has a much higher impact on the results than what we do weekly, monthly or occasionally. The stream must be constantly moving to wear down the rock.  When you are consistently working on something, you will attract even more opportunity.

#4:   Make everything serve the goal

This is not just fortune cookie wisdom. Determined focus is what delivers destiny.  That means you must bind together all of your resources and deploy them as a single force of power.

#5:   Don’t be afraid of set-backs

What scares you? For most of us, it is failure.  To move past the fear, we have to redefine failure. Failure is rarely a valid judgment.  Your plan is going to change.  That is not failure.  That is intelligence at work. Define attempt as research.  It is welcome progress.  Embrace that thinking.  And you will re-channel the fear and stay on track.

I changed my mind! It’s more than your prerogative!

Time for ChangePersonal development expert and author Brian Tracy teaches the value of zero based thinking. This practice invites you to re-examine choices based on the principal of evolving possibilities.

While it may seem obvious, we often need to be reminded that for choices to be unlimited, one of our choices has to be to change direction, to adjust and shift, even stop and re-start.

Emily Dickinson once said that we must “Dwell in possibility”. That is the secret. It is not something you occasionally do. It is where you live. The land of the winners is a citadel built on the art of possibility.

Possibilities are a personal business because we are each unique. We all have our own philosophy of life and point of view that is constantly evolving. Hence the need for re-examining our choices. At any given time, we can see different possibilities. That is what makes this so incredibly powerful. There is truly no limit to what we can accomplish because we can grow into our evolving opportunities.

My favorite success stories involve learning how to apply something already known to a new situation. In these stories someone embraced the idea of a new application of knowledge as a new opportunity for success. Each had to learn something new as well. That is part of the growth process. Each layer builds on the other.

We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading to new paths. ~ Walt Disney

If you want to be an accomplished musician, you start with the scale and go from there. You progressively add to your expertise by layering your knowledge. If you want to be a successful business owner you need some basic understanding of how businesses work in order to see how all of the elements of your company work together to serve your customer. Every discipline has its own version of the musical scale. What is yours? How well do you know it? How are you layering new knowledge to increase your understanding and expertise? To drive positive change?

We must remember though that because change can and will bring with it some fear, we should expect to experience resistance. What we must embrace is the fact that growth transforms and creates new vistas for us. It is a good practice to pay homage to what we enjoyed about what we are leaving behind as long as we understand that growth requires a willingness to change. The key is to be committed to intentional growth.

“The only man I know who behaves sensibly is my tailor. He takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them.” ~ George Bernard Shaw

Take on the role of creator in your life’s design and plan. Take Emily’s advice and dwell in possibility!

Live today like you want tomorrow to be. Live well.

Perfect Just the Way You Are? Perhaps, Perhaps Not!

You are perfect just the way you are! Now that I am a Nana to some pretty spectacular grand-daughters, this is a sentiment that I express on a regular basis. And I absolutely mean it. Those girls are perfection and I will never believe otherwise. Just ask them! You may get a bit of an eye roll from the teenager but no argument that their Nana is their number one fan! Biased? You bet.

For the most part though, we all know that perfection is in reality a myth. Even if seemingly achieved for a moment, it is illusive, interpretive and does not serve us as an ideal.

It’s certainly not true for me. I am constantly looking (and finding!) ways to improve myself. My focus and lens then remains with possibilities. I want to know that I am continuously moving into my growing potential. One of my favorite quotes speaks to this and comes from Emily Dickinson: “Dwell in possibility.” This is a truly fantastic way to live; to see the world and ourselves.

Did you know that September is self-improvement month? A perfect time for us to pause and create a plan for that pursuit of possibilities. With that said, where do we begin? Allow me to offer a thought to help. Don’t make a list. Don’t start there. That simply does not work. We can quickly become overwhelmed and start thinking in probabilities instead of possibilities.

Instead choose one area of your life where you want to see growth and change. It can be a personal discipline, a relationship, a skill. But choose one and begin there. Just focus there. Then choose one immediate action you can take and one continuous habit you can develop over time. One target, two action plans. Begin there.

That’s the “secret sauce” if there is any. Skip the analysis on this one and go right with your instinct and pick one. Because the good news is that you’ll be able to pick another one. And quickly! So don’t worry about whether or not it’s the “right” choice. Just make “a” choice and get started.

Continuous self-improvement is our fuel in any month. That is because the only motivation in life that works every time is this: Progress. So let’s create some progress. And with that, we are creating our own internal fire and motivation for more. And we are well on our way to realizing those possibilities!

Live (improve) today like you want tomorrow to be. Live (improve) well!

 

Your Journal: A Personal Textbook for Life’s Journey

A core personal practice that has been one of the key contributors to my personal growth is journaling. This subject came up recently at a master mind group and it was a reminder that not everyone may know about how powerful this practice can be.

Although it began for me as a young girl (Remember your first diary?) writing everyday about my life and how my world was coming into (or out of!) focus has had its own evolution over the years.

If this is not a practice you employ, I would urge you to consider adding this to your personal development toolbox.

From my experience, the best way to begin journaling is to choose a primary starting purpose for your journal. There are many different ways to use them and over time you will most likely incorporate all of them but to begin, just choose one. Some possibilities include collecting ideas, quotes and reflective thoughts or even a gratitude journal where you record something to be thankful for each day.

The one I like best as a starting point though is the one recommended by Jim Rohn whom I consider to be the best teacher on this particular skill: Recording your challenges and the process you follow to their resolution.

There are a number of reasons why this is effective but primarily it is about creating a space between you and the challenge. When we take the time to write the challenge down, it gets it out of our head and to a place where we can “see” it from a different perspective. Have you ever noticed that the closer we are to something the harder it can be to see it clearly? Getting it on paper and out of your head creates space and the ability to look at it from a different point of view.

When we review the challenge as we’ve written it down, we can begin to see how things really are vs. just how we might have perceived them to be. Surprises will definitely be in store! First we write, then we read and in the end, we analyze.

Here are the four cornerstones of the analyzing process that Jim Rohn teaches:

  1. Look for points that may be exaggerated and out of proportion.
  2. Check for blame vs. responsibility.
  3. Eliminate any expectations that circumstances or people are going to change in order to make the challenge go away. (A favorite quote from Jim has always been: “Things get better when we get better.”)
  4. Look for weak points in the obstacle that could be creative pivot points for the solution.

When we see any challenge through this adjusted lens, different levels of truth emerge. Then when we record all of this and begin to move through to our solution and record that as we go, it becomes a veritable personal textbook for life.

In time, quite often all it will take is one good session with your journal to find a solution or help you make a core decision that would have never been captured any other way.

It will be invaluable for you as you live today like you want tomorrow to be.

Now back to my journal…